"How do I get a Pell Grant?"
Translation: I don't really have an interest in education, but I do like free money. So gimme gimme.
"I tried to log in last night and fill out the forms but I got stuck. Do you think you can help me?"
Translation: I was lazy and didn't feel like doing it. Can you do it for me?
"I haven't been able to work the last few years"
Translation: I have been in prison for the last few years and the IRS does not consider cigarettes as taxable income.
"I haven't filed taxes the last few years."
Translation: I am a drug dealer and have elected not to report my income.
"When does my leftover money get to me? I've got like, books and things I need to buy."
Translation: It's seriously not here yet? I've been waiting for weeks to get a new phone.
"I am having an issue with my instructor."
Translation: I am failing and in no possible way is it my fault.
"My instructor is being unreasonable."
Translation: My paper was due Monday but I turned it in on Wednesday. The "no late paper's" policy she outlined weeks ago in the syllabus is completely unreasonable.
